Self Care

We can become very much like a computer with too many windows open, eventually something has to crash. So as you would log off and shut down your computer to allow it to reboot, you need to also do the same for yourself.

Much of what we have been taught has been centered on how to take care of others. Many of us have never been taught that in order to take care of others, we must pay as good attention to our own self-care. This is not about brushing your teeth, washing the clothes, keeping a tidy house. This includes taking time out, playfulness and fun, being creative, exercise, good nourishing diet, making the time to do what makes you truly happy. When we are feeling happy, whole, nourished, appreciated, energized we are in a much better position to then look after others.

We often feel pulled in every direction, as a friend, sister, mother, wife, partner, lover, employee, career, cleaner, there are so many hats we wear as women. One of the hardest things for us to say is “NO”, which is odd because we could say it easily when we were 2 years old but like many things, we are taught not to. So instead of trying to say NO more to others, when appropriate, try to say YES more to you.

Saying no does not make us a bad person, if anything it can be empowering and energizing. It can make us stop being the victim and feeling that we are only here to make everyone’s life run smoothly, forgetting the importance of our own needs.

If you are the type of person who finds it hard saying no, take the challenge and try it out. You may be able to delegate the job to someone else or offer guidance to the one asking. Let others respect your time and they can learn not to take you for granted. This does not mean that you need to say NO to everything, just choose what you want to do, without causing any resentment. Make yourself unavailable to others for a certain amount of time each week to spend time just for you. Take notice of how that makes you feel. Spreading your self too thinly does no one any good. Stop and smell the roses – you just may find a treasure you were not expecting.

Coaching question:

How well do you take care of yourself?

Do you feel guilty when you aren’t “doing” anything?

When was the last time you did something just because?

This month, find some ways to find a balance between taking care of you and a loved one so everyone's needs are met.