Ladies, Feeling Low on Confidence?

We all face challenges and wonder if we can succeed at something new. As long as we believe that we cannot do something, we are right. No matter how hard we try, the belief wins every time.

Because of this negative belief, a lack of confidence quickly moves in. Why are there so many successful, intelligent women who struggle with confidence in different areas of their life? Has our world created a false, unrealistic image of what we are supposed to look like and act like?

A woman with low confidence is plagued with self-doubt, can be double-minded, and indecisive. Low confidence can undermine what a woman does, feels and decides and worse of all it prevents her from reaching her true potential.

Some tips to help build confidence;

• Stop the negative self talk, it can become a habit which causes low self esteem and unhappiness and is very rarely true. Change those “I’m not good enough” thoughts to “I am just as able as anyone else, probably better”.

• Saying NO and only no, you don’t always need to explain yourself.

• Confident people make it a habit to think and act positively. The flow on effects of being, doing and feeling confident creates harmony, health and fun in your life; allow us to accomplish much more out of life.

• Act the way you want to be and the way you want to be seen. Take note of your posture, your dress, how you treat others and yourself. Smile and look confident, before long you will be feeling more confident. Sometimes you just need to believe it to achieve it.

• Fake it till you make it

• Give yourself permission to be different and unique. Give yourself permission that it’s OK to be wrong and make mistakes – it’s how we learn and transition through life.

• Write a positive affirmation and say it daily to yourself such as:. I know that I can master anything or I am capable and strong or I trust in myself
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Coaching:

This week pay attention to how you feel about yourself. Whatever you believe is showing up in your life. If you want to change your life, change your beliefs about what you can and cannot do.

Quote:

“The positive thinker sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible.” – Author Unknown

Transition for Professional Women

For many Professional Women the obvious transitions we experience are our within our career, our workplace and the part we play in them. Within the work environment the transitions of Profession Women include that of re-entering the work force, perhaps after having raised a family and taking some time away from paid work, changing career paths, promotions, further study, surviving in a male dominated working environment and finally retirement.

These transitions alone can cause much overwhelm and exhaustion which can lead to poor health, stress and low energy levels.Women in the working environment need to juggle many hats to stay on top of life. They can find themselves being pulled in many directions by children, partners, work colleagues, parents, siblings and even committees and other interests they may have.

So many transitions both inside and outside the work environment can greatly impact on our health, our confidence and our time in a negative way if allowed to go unchecked. Dealing with changing relationships, needing to relocate, maintaining our financial affairs, coping with body issues, coping with growing children and aging parents all leaves very little time to deal with your self! Change is not something that happens now and again, it is a way of life. Just as we think things are getting back to normal, we come face to face with the next change; stability seems to be a thing of the past.

As individual and unique as each of my clients are, many women who come to me for coaching have similar concerns and goals. A great tool for overworked professional women is the ability to use and maintain a diary and to-do list - do it daily and do it well. Understanding the importance of scheduling in me-time and being able to set and stick to time limits both in and outside working hours can greatly lessen stress levels.

You cannot be everything to everyone if you are running on empty so be aware of maintaining good eating and exercise habits as well as scheduling in time for fun, pampering, creativity and play each week.

Coaching Questions;

How does your work contribute to your life goals?

Are you in a career that you always dreamed of?

What would you like more time to do?

Quote:

Yes, there are many things that need to get done, but in this moment I have to do nothing.

—Oprah Winfrey

Changes can be challenging

We can deeply desire a change, but when we sit back and look at it we can feel overwhelmed and disillusioned. We are not alone, this happens to everyone at some time or another. We see achievements others have made in their career, fitness, finance or other areas of their life and feel in awe. What we don’t see is how the goal took shape and what needed to occur during the journey. We don’t see the time spent, the obstacles overtaken, the heartbreak and disillusionment along the way, the number of times the goal may have been given up on or re-designed, plenty of these hiccups can occur along the way. It is most uncommon for a goal to fall into place without any angst at all and it is a good thing too as it is the journeys that can make the finished outcome have stronger results and be more rewarding.

How do you climb a mountain, eat an elephant or build a wall? By taking one step, one bite or one brick at a time! You can either do it on your own, or with a little help. The first step is to decide on what you want, what you want to change or what you’d like to achieve. Now break it down into small achievable steps and decide when you want to finish by and begin with baby steps, one step at a time.

Staying motivated can be a tricky obstacle in the process, so if your not working with a coach, tell someone else what you are doing so they can check in on you to see how you are progressing. It is important to be kind to yourself and reward yourself along the way, as you make progress and achieve the small steps – it doesn’t matter how small they may be as they are all important steps in the big picture. Be honest with yourself and don’t worry if you need to reassess your goal or change your finish time. The important thing is that you are making progress and change is happening.

Remember with many challenges, we need persistence, consistence and patience.

Quote:

"In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins - not through strength, but through persistence." Anonymous

Coaching tip:

What is a small action step you can take this week, towards achieving your goal? If your goal is to loose weight, list 3 things you can change in your week such as walk 30 minutes each day, cut out sweets from your diet, drink more water, write a food journal, and do at least one thing this week to get started.

Female Midlife Crisis

Midlife Crisis is usually associated with men, but did you know that women are just as likely to experience a midlife crisis? Did you also know that men and women who lead a purpose filled and fulfilling life, and are able to meet their own needs as well as their partners are less likely to experience a midlife crisis?

If a man works long hours, spends most of his free time with his family and doesn’t pursue his own interests he is a sitting duck and is in danger of going through the MLC?

Men get to a certain age and feel that life is passing them by. They can become fearful of aging, of becoming ill and less attractive to the opposite sex. They also are feeling that goals they have set just may never happen and death is not so far off anymore!

If a woman spends her days taking care of the kids, the house, the cooking and cleaning – putting everyone else’s needs before her own, and has no outside interest she also is in danger of the MLC. Women though, on the other hand find themselves at a certain age and realise they finally have the opportunity to do the things they have been putting off whilst taking care of the family. They see the kids have grown and they now have more time and more financial security to do the things they’ve been putting on hold. Experiencing the change of life can also cause her to question how she has lived her life and help her decide whether she should make the changes she’s always wanted.

A MLC goes through the same stages as all transitions; Shock, Denial, Depression, Anger and finally Acceptance. Some people transition through the stages smoothly; others will go back and forth, stuck in the middle three stages, until they finally get to acceptance.

Any crisis is an opportunity to grow and find positive outcomes. Take the MLC as the perfect time to find who you really are and unleash those hidden passions. Write the book, climb the mountain, learn a language, live in Italy for 6 months – the world is your oyster, so live your life.

Female midlife crisis? I prefer to think of it as “female midlife empowerment” and dive straight on in, show the younger generation just how it’s done.

Coaching Questions:

• What are 2 things that are on your “would love to do one day” list?
• What’s stopping you from getting started?
• If not now, when?

Extra Reading:

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1059032,00.html

Self Care

We can become very much like a computer with too many windows open, eventually something has to crash. So as you would log off and shut down your computer to allow it to reboot, you need to also do the same for yourself.

Much of what we have been taught has been centered on how to take care of others. Many of us have never been taught that in order to take care of others, we must pay as good attention to our own self-care. This is not about brushing your teeth, washing the clothes, keeping a tidy house. This includes taking time out, playfulness and fun, being creative, exercise, good nourishing diet, making the time to do what makes you truly happy. When we are feeling happy, whole, nourished, appreciated, energized we are in a much better position to then look after others.

We often feel pulled in every direction, as a friend, sister, mother, wife, partner, lover, employee, career, cleaner, there are so many hats we wear as women. One of the hardest things for us to say is “NO”, which is odd because we could say it easily when we were 2 years old but like many things, we are taught not to. So instead of trying to say NO more to others, when appropriate, try to say YES more to you.

Saying no does not make us a bad person, if anything it can be empowering and energizing. It can make us stop being the victim and feeling that we are only here to make everyone’s life run smoothly, forgetting the importance of our own needs.

If you are the type of person who finds it hard saying no, take the challenge and try it out. You may be able to delegate the job to someone else or offer guidance to the one asking. Let others respect your time and they can learn not to take you for granted. This does not mean that you need to say NO to everything, just choose what you want to do, without causing any resentment. Make yourself unavailable to others for a certain amount of time each week to spend time just for you. Take notice of how that makes you feel. Spreading your self too thinly does no one any good. Stop and smell the roses – you just may find a treasure you were not expecting.

Coaching question:

How well do you take care of yourself?

Do you feel guilty when you aren’t “doing” anything?

When was the last time you did something just because?

This month, find some ways to find a balance between taking care of you and a loved one so everyone's needs are met.

Too Nice or Just Too Soft?

We’ve all heard someone say and even said it ourselves “You’re just too nice.”

Think about that statement for a moment. Is that really true? Are you so nice that you allow people to walk over you and or your business?

Often being “too nice” is just taking the easy way out…..…steering clear of confrontation, not wanting to rock the boat! Is this “Too Nice” employer really doing the best thing – the nice thing for their staff, business and themselves? Or are they just deferring the inevitable disciplinary or under-performing warning that someone eventually needs to hear?

What would happen if an employer, parent, teacher, friend took the “too nice” option away and dealt with the issues as they arose? It would allow each party to confer and take appropriate action then and there. Being able to clear the air and allow for open communication. Perhaps there are underlying reasons that the employer is underperforming and a quick and regular check-in could save any upset, disciplinary action or even dismissal occurring. Could waiting until the shit hits the fan so to speak, be unfair to the receiver, especially if actions could have been taken earlier to prevent it getting to that stage.

Some benefits of not being too soft could be as rewarding as uncovering skills and hidden talents, not allowing bad habits and feelings to fester and spread, uncovering concerns and problems that can actually benefit the organization if brought into the open. When one is required to be made accountable for actions and expected to step-up, the flow on effect is personal pride and self worth, learning and using new skills, and possibly a stronger bottom line for the organization, hopeful flowing onto the employee.

If you are really nice, giving someone fair and honest feedback early and as required is the nice thing to do, not only for your employee but for your own stress levels and others around you. Can one not be strong, fair and nice?

Coaching Question:

o Have you found yourself taking the” too nice” option in the past to escape confrontation?

o What are you not doing in your life because you are being too nice?

o What are 2 things you are willing to stop putting up with this month?

Resource Reading:

Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott

Quote:

"There is no strength without challenge, adversity, resistance and often pain. Strength comes from our ability to stand up, face resistance and walk through it." Oprah

First Stage of Transition

Change is a constant, and when we realize that is it inevitable, many emotions begin to emerge. Some of these feelings, which are all very natural, can be numbness, fear, anxiety, excitement, apprehension, grief, anger, feeling trapped, relief, uncertainty.

Whether the transition you are experiencing is something you are wanting such as a marriage, new baby, relocation or new job – or one that has been thrust upon you, you may feel overwhelmed or even shocked, unable to see the future clearly. Be aware that this can be a period where you do not think clearly and is best not be make decisions with haste. Also what you are experiencing is very natural and you are not alone.

This is the first stage of transition; it can be called “Discomfort”, “Losing Focus” even “Disbelief or Denial”. It is a good idea to stick with routines that you know work, try not to over commit and take time out for yourself when you need to. It is not the time to add other changes to your life such as weight loss or volunteering for charity work. Take time for yourself and include the things you love to do and find ways to nurture yourself, such as yoga, reading, having fresh flowers around you, listening to music, drinking favorite teas, hitting a golf ball, being with friends, being in nature.

Every transition begins with an ending, and as with all endings you need time to let go of the past.

Coaching questions;

What scares you most about this change?

What does the next level look like?

Clutter

I tend to be a procrastinator. I also know that I am not alone!

I decided this week, to give myself a challenge and put into action something that I have been delaying - Clearing Clutter - one thing that really does get me down, living in clutter – potential chaos even!

When we talk about de-cluttering, people usually start thinking about the most obvious places in need, their desk and work area, the kitchen or wardrobe. There are many areas in our lives which need to be de-cluttered that are not so obvious such as areas in the garden or garage, activities which no longer serve us, newsletters we subscribe to, files on our computer, to-do lists and even people!

So whether it is business or private, Andrew Mellen suggests the following Ground Rules;

1. Everything you own should have value, either because it’s functional or beautiful or you just love it

2. Every item needs a place where it “lives.”

3. Focus on one thing at a time.

As I work through my list one area at a time and change my procrastinating habit, it is amazing how good it feels. I can use the above mentioned grounds rules as a guide to allow a wonderful new space and sense of calmness to emerge, not to mention a great feeling of achievement and joy.

Very important areas we may not think of to de-clutter are our thoughts, for they can cause great anxiety and stress. The secret here is to ask the question “what can and can’t you change?” Maybe the only thing you can change about certain situations is your attitude - for all the worrying we do, things we don’t like still happen.

Ask yourself what overwhelms you? Figure out what you can do to avoid situations like that or keep them from escalating. Have a plan in place for when these situations arise so you are better armed to cope with them.

So here is a challenge for you.

What area of your life have you wanted to de-clutter? Can you put it into action this week? The sense of accomplishment will be well worth the doing.

How was 2010 for you?

Did you achieve all the things that you wanted to? Did you loose that bit of extra weight, take that holiday you’ve been dreaming of, enroll into a coarse that has been on your mind for ages, find better paid employment that you’ve been discussing with others, take up that gym membership or golf lessons, cut back on spending, read the books that have been recommended to you, taken more time to be with friends and family? The list can go on and on!

Is this what you want to be asked again at the end of 2011? Did you achieve all the things that you wanted to? You have the opportunity to change the answers to the questions. What do you want those answers to be?

As a coach I can confirm that there is no better time to get your intentions into action than today. Get a vision of what you want. Make is clear, but not too safe. It is important to stretch yourself. Many things worth achieving are sometimes just outside your comfort zone. When your vision is clear, set your goals. Make yourself accountable by sharing your goals with a friend or colleague or coach. Put processes into place to make your goal achievable, be sure to be realistic on time frames and reward yourself with the progress you make along the way.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do”. Mark Twain

Just For Today

This is too good not to share, so please enjoy the following article by Bonnie Ross-Parke The Connection Diva www.bonnierossparker.com


"Remember the expression, “What a difference a day makes”?
Well, I decided to focus on the possibilities of one day to see
what might happen with the right attitude.

Just for Today I will not tackle all of my “to do list”, but rather,
do what I can and be ok with what I accomplish. Just for Today
I will take the time to read, to expand my awareness on an issue,
or engage in an activity that is enlightening and stretches my
thinking.

Just for Today I will accept whatever comes my way. I know the
universe doesn't always provide what I want, but rather, produces
what ends up serving my best interest. I will accept the actions,
ideas, and behaviors of others by giving them permission to be
who they are.

Just for Today I will implement a plan of action and not fall into the
trap of meeting someone else's expectations or demands on my time.
The operative word today is FOCUS. It is my intention to stay
focused and accomplish the main goal of the day.

Just for Today I will engage in generosity by doing a good deed for
the joy it will bring me without needing or expecting something in
return. I will express gratitude to people regardless of how small their
influence is in the bigger picture of life.

Just for Today I will do things I really don't enjoy doing to strengthen
my character. I will exercise and not complain. I will eat in
moderation knowing that there are people everywhere who are underfed.
I will overlook the inconveniences of life because often life gives us the test
first and the lesson comes later.

Just for Today I will remain untroubled. I will be steadfast in my
commitments, give myself permission to be imperfect, and offer
the world my best self. And when the day is over I will look back
and be grateful that I did what I set out to do, even if it was
Just for Today!"

Inspirational Parable ~ The Cracked Pot

A person carrying water had two large pots each hung on each end
of a pole, which he carried across his neck. One of the pots had
a crack in it, and while the other pot was perfect and always
delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk
from the stream to the master’s house, the cracked pot arrived
only half full. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its
perfect accomplishments.

But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection.
This went on daily for two full years. And finally the imperfect
pot spoke to the water carrier one day by the stream. "I am
ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you." "Why?" asked
the carrier. "For two years, I have been able to deliver only
half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak
out all the way back to your house," the pot said. The water
carrier replied, "As we return to the house, I want you to notice
the beautiful flowers along the path." Indeed, as they went up
the hill, the cracked pot noticed there were beautiful wild
flowers on the side of the path, and this cheered it some.

But at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had
leaked out half its load, and so again the Pot apologized for its
failure. The carrier said to the pot, "Did you notice that there
were flowers only on your side of your path, but not on the other
pot's side? Every day while we walk back from the stream, you've
watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these
beautiful flowers to decorate my table. Without you being just
the way you are, I would not have this beauty to grace my house."

Know that in our weakness we find our strength

Nelson Mandela

"If you are humble, you are no threat to anybody. Some behave in a way that dominates others. That's a mistake. If you want the cooperation of humans around you, you must make them feel they are important—and you do that by being genuine and humble. You know that other people have qualities that may be better than your own. Let them express them."

Why Wait?

I have noticed a common theme with my clients and people I have spoken to. When asked if they are glad that they have made changes, they tell me “yes” but their only regret is that they did not make the changes sooner.

With waiting being such a common regret, why do we so often resist making a change? My best guess is fear! Even when we are unhappy where we are fear keeps us from doing what we will later regret not doing sooner. We have a fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of achieving. Fear of change can be very confronting.

Good news is, is that if we make a change that we are unhappy with, we can change it again, and allow each experience to teach us something. Change is constant and all change is a process, so any movement is better than staying stagnant. Instead of waiting for a change to come to you, go ahead and make a change, even the smallest of changes is better than doing nothing.

I find that people regret more what they don’t do than what they do. Lose the wait and begin making the change you want now happen. Life is about experimenting and discovering, not playing it safe and staying stuck.

Ask yourself “What is one thing in my life I will regret not doing this year?” Promise yourself to live without regret and figure out a way to start making it happen. You don’t have to do it all at once, change takes time. Take small steps and commit to doing at least one thing a day that will move you closer to the change you want.

"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life and in change there is power." Alan Cohen

New Years Intentions vs. New Years Resolution

In less than one months time the majority of us are going to set some New Years Resolutions for 2010. Why do so many people talk of, and even admit to, making New Year's resolutions when almost none of them will be kept?

Statistics show that somewhere in the vicinity of 97% of New Year's resolutions won't be kept.…why? The reasons are simple…
1. Most people expect not to keep a resolution
2. Most don't know how to truly set goals or don't believe it matters

Try instead to set an Intention for your new life – not just your new year. List your top 3 commitments for your personal health and wellness and build them into your everyday life. Look for the bigger need behind the desire, what is really important for you? It may be to have more sleep and rest, get more relaxation and fun, add physical activity into everyday, eat with awareness or just be grateful and reflect on the day.

Structure + willpower = success
Willpower alone will not work; it must be combined with structures. Allow your structures to become habits by using your daily planner, working with a buddy or coach and remember to reward yourself for successes. Focus on the end result.

Through accountability and having support systems in place the seemingly unattainable can become achievable.

“Whether we realize it or not, all of us are responsible for creating the body we live in.”— Deepak Chopra

This short quote can pack quite a punch. Our dear friend has just experienced a heart attack and we are very grateful he will have a full recovery though he realizes that some life changes are overdue. This scary experience also highlighted to me and my family not to take our bodies for granted. The little” tap on the shoulder” was a wake up call to look after our bodies and treat them with respect.

We choose what we put into it and how we keep it maintained. Most people are very aware of outward appearances by wearing clean and neat clothes and being well groomed. We are also aware of the importance of looking after and maintaining a car, bike, house or boat and know that it will not run efficiently if we do not keep it regularly tuned up and serviced. So why is then that we take our own bodies for granted until something happens? Take some time to give your body an overhaul. Do a self diet and fitness check list, be honest and if needed get some assistance? Ask where you need improving on and what needs to go! Make a visit for a medical and eye check and a dental check and any other check that you have been putting off. Invest in yourself, cause you are not only doing yourself and your loved ones a favour, you are showing respect and gratitude for the wonderful body you where given.

We don’t know what our future holds for us, but we can have some say on what condition it will be in.

Complementary Consultation

Being a business owner, executive or professional has such a knee jerk reaction with the amount of time spent at work; it throws other areas of your life way out off balance.

I have asked my clients to list some of the consequences of this unbalanced life style, and have found a pattern emerging.

Can you say yes to some or all of these:-

• Suffering ill health or often getting colds or injury
• Tired and lack energy
• Limited family time
• Feeling stressed
• Lacking creativity in decision making
• Personal fitness not getting a look in
• Relationship breakdowns

I am offering 50 Complimentary Consultations over the next several weeks, to invite professionals to focus on how their Work/Life balance is looking. I will send you a form with 4 questions to answer regarding your current Work/Life Balance and when you return to me, we will book a free 30 minute phone consultation. Email me at julie@lifefocusplus.com with Complementary Consultation in the heading and make the first step toward bringing that much needed balance back into your life.

Never Enough Time?

Never Enough Time?

Does that sound familiar to you?

Is it really true?

If your work day is not long enough and work commitments are the problem, we can look at just a few changes that could make your day flow easier, such as making lists, prioritising tasks, taking 10 minutes at the end of the work day to plan your next day, block off time where you cannot be disturbed and stick to it. All these things you all ready know, right?

Is it your home and social life suffering without enough hours? Are you being realistic with what you want to achieve with the time you have to achieve it? Or is your time being stolen by activities that do not serve you i.e. watching too much television, sleeping in when you could be out and about, doing things or being with people who are not feeding your soul or are you just straight out procrastinating?

There always has been and will be 24 hours in a day ~ what you do with it is up to!

As a coach I work with Time Management and Life / Work Balance, these are important issues that affect everyone. Time is something that once it is gone, you cannot get back. This is reality!

At the beginning of each week is a great time to review and plan the brand new week ahead. Prioritise and plan what you want to achieve during the week and ask yourself how important it is for to accomplish it? If it is something of high importance, either for work or personal, block off time for it in your diary now! If it is a large project, you may need to block out several times during the week, or over a few weeks, to work on this goal. Be realistic and don’t overstretch yourself. If a goal is not of a high importance, you can still give it time during your week, but allow it to be moved if needed. Give yourself permission to replace it with a higher priority task without feeling guilty. It can be re-diarised for a later date – just re-schedule it, at the time of moving so it is not forgotten, know that it is out of your head. It is likely that it will become a high priority at a later date.

If your time management, or lack of it, is causing you stress, it may be time to work with a coach who can help you with your day to day activities. Are your goals in line with your values? Do you know what your true values are? Visit my website and do the Values Worksheet to find out http://www.lifefocusplus.com/

Who, exactly seeks out a coach? -” Winners who want even more out of life." -Chicago Tribune

Crabby Old Woman

When an old lady died in the geriatric ward of a small hospital near Dundee, Scotland, it was believed that she had nothing left of any value.

Later, when the nurses were going through her meagre possessions, they found this poem. Its quality and content so impressed the staff that copies were made and distributed to every nurse in the hospital. One nurse took her copy to Ireland.

The old lady's sole bequest to posterity has since appeared in the Christmas edition of the News Magazine of the North Ireland Association for Mental Health. A slide presentation has also been made based on her simple, but eloquent, poem.



Crabby Old Woman



What do you see, nurses................What do you see?

What are you thinking......When you're looking at me?

A crabby old woman..........................Not very wise,

Uncertain of habit,......................With faraway eyes?



Who dribbles her food ............... And makes no reply.

When you say in a loud voice.......'I do wish you'd try!'

Who seems not to notice ..........The things that you do,

And forever is losing .....................A stocking or shoe?



Who, resisting or not, ..............Lets you do as you will,

With bathing and feeding, ..............The long day to fill?

Is that what you're thinking?......... Is that what you see?

Then open your eyes, nurse,.....You're not looking at me.



I'll tell you who I am .......................As I sit here so still,

As I do at your bidding, ................... As I eat at your will.

I'm a small child of ten..............With a father and mother,

Brothers and sisters.......................Who love one another.



A young girl of sixteen ...................With wings on her feet

Dreaming that soon now ..................... A lover she'll meet.

A bride soon at twenty, ................... My heart gives a leap,

Remembering the vows ............... That I promised to keep.



At twenty-five now,.....................I have young of my own,

Who need me to guide ............... And a secure happy home.

A woman of thirty,.................... My young now grown fast,

Bound to each other.....................With ties that should last.



At forty, my young sons..............Have grown and are gone,

But my man's beside me.....................To see I don't mourn

At fifty once more,...................Babies play round my knee,

Again we know children,................... My loved one and me.



Dark days are upon me,.......................My husband is dead,

I look at the future,.............................I shudder with dread.

For my young are all rearing .................Young of their own,

And I think of the years.......... And the love that I've known.



I'm now an old woman......................... And nature is cruel;

Tis jest to make old age ............................. Look like a fool.

The body, it crumbles,..................... Grace and vigor depart,

There is now a stone.................... Where I once had a heart.



But inside this old carcass................ A young girl still dwells,

And now and again,...................... My battered heart swells.

I remember the joys,.......................... I remember the pain,

And I'm loving and living.............................. Life over again.



I think of the years..................... All too few, gone too fast,

And accept the stark fact......................That nothing can last.

So open your eyes, people,.............................Open and see,

Not a crabby old woman;..........Look closer......see,.....ME!!



Remember this poem when you next meet an older person who you might brush aside without looking at the young soul within.....we will all, one day, be there, too!

You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich.

You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.

You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.

You cannot lift the wage earner up by pulling the wage payer down.

You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.

You cannot build character and courage by taking away men's initiative and independence.

You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves.

-Abraham Lincoln

Year Half Over!

As we come to the end of June, it is a great time to reflect on the months we have just visited.

Have your New Year resolutions, dreams and goals for 2009 been put in place? Have all or some been achieved or have they been forgotten about and put into the "too hard" basket or "it was just a dream" basket?
This time of year is a great time to re-visit goals that you have and uncover new ones to accomplish. Did you write a list at the start of the year that you can now read over and excite yourself again about?
Do you need some encouragement or support with putting plans into actions? All goals and dreams need a starting point ~ which is to realise that that is what you want. See, you've started already, you have some of those already. Next step is to break that goal down into baby steps and even work with your coach to turn your dreams and goals into realities.

This year has found me graduating from my coaching coarse, publishing my web site and building my coaching business. It was a goal I set for myself last year and have such satisfaction seeing it complete. The joy I get from working with my clients is more than I could have expected and each day brings new insights, challenges and ways for me to grow.

Over the next half of this year I intend to turn my hand at writing some articles for publication, a dream that I have had for a while and one that I will turn into a reality.

Have a wonderful second half of 2009 and don't loose sight of your dreams ~ make them happen.