Self Help

I can’t help but feel amused at the number of times lately that I have found myself standing and searching for a book that is recommended reading, and it is in the “Self Help” section of the bookstore. I have fun seeing myself in others eyes as having been just dumped, not coping – a scene straight out of 'Bridget Jone's Diary'. Small things can make me smile :o) It is interesting how we view ourselves isn’t it? Often, it is the opposite as to how others really see us.

So from all my readings, listening and learning, a common thread weaves through my life. An awareness that I became conscious of a few years ago, after reading another book! That is Gratitude. I have read that gratitude; love and appreciation are the highest forms of vibrations and when you are having these thoughts, there is no room for the negative feelings. As more of your feelings, thoughts and words become positive you start attracting more of the same feelings thoughts and words. Same attracts same.

I have used a gratitude journal, one that I would write 5 things into which I was grateful for that day. I haven’t used it for a while, but I still take the time and run these thoughts through my mind before I go to sleep each night.

Last nights list was; giving thanks for the beautiful sunny day we had after such a cold start in the morning. I was grateful for having a cassette player in my car, so that I could listen to something undisturbed whilst driving. I was grateful for my son who came up to my office for a visit and a wonderful hug. I gave thanks for finding a few hours to work on my coarse work, which is rare to find. I was so grateful for my wonderful warm bed at the end of a long day and gave thanks for so many things that I have and hope never to take them for granted.

Self help is just what it says, to help self - thats you! Be aware of all the great qualities you have, take some time to list them down. See in yourself what others see and take control of you. Find things to be grateful for each and every day. Even after a horrible, taxing, flu ridden day, look for a bright moment. Someone who was being kind to you or another person, putting on your slippers at the end of a long day, or just knowing that the day is over and the sun will come up again in the morning to begin another wonderful day.

“To change the world, you must change yourself first. To help the world, you must help yourself first. To understand the world, you must understand your self first.” Annette Noontil

Time for Action

I tend to be a procrastinator. I know that I should be doing something and usually do get around to doing it sooner or later. I also know that I am not alone!

I decided this week, to give myself a challenge and put into action something that I have been delaying or putting off. So, me being me, I chose a safe and easy task to begin with. “Clearing the clutter.” This is one thing that really does get me down, living in clutter. So starting with the pantry, whilst cooking dinner, shelf by shelf every item was removed, area cleaned and things neatly returned. I am happy to share with you that all the shelves are looking fabulous. I now know what was living way back in the dark and more than one item have moved on to land fill (sorry about that). Wow, I do feel so much better when I open that pantry door. It is an achievement, though granted a small one. Next on my de-clutter list is the spare bedroom where all the children’s clothes, books and toys are biding their time. Mind you the children are no longer children, so this is a job that is well overdue.

As I work through my list and change my procrastinating habits, it is amazing how good it feels. My next big move is with my coaching and commencing my trial sessions. I have wonderful volunteers’ and am working on my trail session structure, which is just about complete. It will feel very rewarding to then tick off having done several of these sessions.

The word “should” needs to exit my vocabulary and be replaced with the word “will”. I don’t want to be doing what others want me to do, hence what I feel I “should” be doing. It is time to take charge and do the things I want to do and will do.

So here is a challenge for you. What exists in your life right now that you have been delaying? Can you put it into action this week? Start small, baby steps. The sense of accomplishment will be well worth the doing.

Nurturing

What do you think of when you hear the word Nurturing? Do you think as a parent and nurturing children & family, or tending a garden, perhaps cooking healthy homely meals comes to mind or is it nurturing yourself

The dictionary says: nurture 1 : to supply with nourishment 2 : educate 3 : to further the development of . Dates back to the 15^th Century – so it’s been around for a long time.

I have been very fortunate to have attended a wonderful retreat and enjoy five whole days of nurturing mind, body and spirit with my wonderful husband. Here is the link to where I can recommend some wonderful pampering. http://www.gaiaretreat.com.au/

Time out is so important. I heard a great analogy yesterday that I would like to share “We can become very much like a computer with too many windows open, eventually something has to crash.” So as you would log off and shut down your computer to allow it to reboot, you need to also do the same for yourself.

This week also after having my blissful week away, I had news of two beautiful nieces of mine having been harmed, by no fault of their own. One niece, an air born germ, which has caused a terrible illness and possible long-term damage which she, may have to live with. Another person, using drugs and attempting to harm a beautiful young girl, caused the second incident. Hearing these events have made me stop and really appreciate how special our children are and how we, as parents, family and friends will never stop wanting to nurture and protect them. Such a traumatic experience in such young people we want to protect from. The trauma felt from these events ripples through from victim to parent to other family members to friends. They both could have been so very much worse than they were, so we are extremely grateful for that

Take time out to appreciate what we have, nourish children, family, friends and self without forgetting our mother earth.

Take Action

It is easy to sit and let things happen, go with the flow so to speak. Doing this is fine if we are happy to stagnate and live a safe, sometimes non-eventful life! We also risk not growing as a person, experiencing new things and places, or even just having fun. Or we can decide to take some action, do something, give ourselves an objective, and go for it. What can stop us from taking action can be fear of failure, but is fear of not trying a worse option?

Give yourself an objective, to try or do something new and foreign to you, something out of your comfort zone. Even something you have been putting off. Turn it into a game, and have some fun with it. Reward yourself along the way with small treats as a self-acknowledgement when you have accomplished all or even part of your objective.

If this is too hard to get started on, look at the strengths you already have and expand on them. This is something that can be fun to do and you will feel enthused because it is easy and familiar to you. Being enthused can give you the confidence to then try something that you have been putting of, because it’s not so enjoyable.

Working on your strengths can be good for the soul. How often do you take your strengths for granted and not acknowledge them. List your strengths, start with one area of your life at a time ~ you will be amazed at just how many you have. Write down 20, then another 20 and then more again, then move onto another area of your life, aim for 100 strengths in each area. Take your time, do it over months if you need to. This can now become a list you revisit, add too and remind yourself that yeah, wow look at all these things that I am great at. What you may consider to be small strengths may just be the opposite of someone else.

Just have fun, take some action, and enjoy what happens.